You have booked the flights, secured a beautiful villa in Amed, and scheduled your dream dives at the Liberty Wreck. You have also hired a wonderful, vetted Balinese nanny.
But as the moment approaches to leave your toddler for the first time in this strange new place, panic sets in. Your child is clinging to your leg, tearful and terrified. You feel immense guilt, and suddenly, that dive trip doesn’t seem so appealing.
This scenario is incredibly common. Asking a young child to accept a new caregiver in an unfamiliar environment (new smells, new heat, new bed) is a lot. Their sense of security is rocked.
The key to a successful, tear-free holiday isn’t just finding the right nanny; it’s managing the transition. Here is a psychological roadmap to preparing your child for a new nanny in Amed.
Phase 1: The Pre-Trip Prep (Back Home)
Do not wait until you arrive in Bali to mention the nanny. Preparation begins weeks ahead.
- Talk About the “Special Friend”: Start mentioning that in Bali, a “special new friend” will come to play with them. Avoid the word “babysitter” if it has negative connotations at home. Frame it positively: “Mommy and Daddy are going diving to look at fish, and you get to have a special play date with Bu Wayan!”
- Show Pictures (If Possible): If you booked through a reputable agency, ask if they can send a profile photo of the nanny. Show your child: “Look, this is Wayan! She has a kind smile. I wonder what games she knows?” Familiarity breeds comfort.
- Role-Play: Use dolls or teddy bears to act out the scenario. Have the teddy bear parents say goodbye, leave the baby bear with a “nanny bear” who does fun activities, and then have the parents enthusiastically return. This normalizes the cycle of departure and return.
Phase 2: The “Warm-Up” (Upon Arrival in Amed)
The biggest mistake parents make is the “drop and run”—hiring the nanny to arrive exactly at the moment the parents need to leave. This is terrifying for a child.
- The Golden Hour (The Paid Overlap): Book your nanny to arrive at least one hour before you actually need to leave. Yes, pay for this hour. It is the best investment you will make for your peace of mind.
- Be Present, But Boring: During this overlap hour, stay in the villa but disengage. Sit on the couch and read a book or look at your phone. Let the nanny be the “fun” one with the toys, bubbles, or coloring books.
- The Handover of Power: Allow the nanny to take over caregiving tasks while you are still there. Let her get the snack, change the diaper, or help them with their shoes. This signals to the child that you trust this person to care for their needs.
Phase 3: The Departure Ritual
When it is finally time to leave, how you handle those final two minutes determines everything.
- Never Sneak Out: Slipping away while your child is distracted seems easier in the moment, but it shatters trust. When they realize you are gone, their anxiety spikes, and they will be terrified to let you out of their sight next time.
- The Confident Goodbye: Say goodbye firmly and cheerfully. Get down to their level, give a big hug and kiss, and state clearly that you will be back.
- Use Concrete Timeframes: Toddlers don’t understand “I’ll be back at 2 PM.” Instead, say: “I will be back after you have had your nap and eaten your afternoon snack.”
- The Transition Object: Ensure they have a comfort object from home—a favorite blanket, stuffie, or pacifier—in their hands during the goodbye. This is their anchor in a new environment.
Phase 4: Manage Your Own Anxiety
Children are emotional sponges. If you are hesitant, guilty, or anxious with the nanny, your child will sense it immediately and interpret the situation as unsafe.
Even if your stomach is in knots, you must project absolute confidence. Smile warmly at the nanny. Speak to her respectfully and enthusiastically. Show your child that you trust her.
Once you walk out the door, do not hesitate. Do not look back. If you need to cry, do it in the car on the way to the dive shop.
The Balinese Advantage
Remember, you have a secret weapon: Balinese culture. Balinese women are exceptionally warm, patient, and community-oriented with children. They are used to kids being kids. If your child cries for the first 10 minutes after you leave, trust that an experienced Balinese nanny knows exactly how to soothe and distract them with gentle kindness.
By preparing your child and respecting their emotional needs during this transition, you aren’t just buying yourself free time; you are teaching your child resilience and allowing them to form a beautiful connection with someone new.